Work Relationships...

I'm just sitting here at my desk at work (blogging is work isn't it? Maybe don't answer that!)

Anyways, we got a whole new crop of staff this week, new two-year interns and new summer interns, and it has just caused me to reflect on all the staff, all the relationships that have come and gone over my time here. And as I look back, I have come to one very deep, very profound realization...

Work relationships really are just like any other relationships. A small microcosm of the outside world, if you will...

With the people you work with you laugh together (this often takes place at my expense), you cry together (I do the most of this I believe). You really experience a whole range of emotions and life together. Relationships at work can be a great blessing.

But the reality is that work relationships are like other relationships (duh!) in everything... the good, the bad, and the ugly. And sometimes when you have been around each other for too long, like 18 hour long staff meetings, you just want to pull your hair out.

And the worst is when the other person just has no clue...

Alright, that is pretty much all I have to say about that.

Thankful for you blog friends, since I don't really know you...you never make me want to pull my hairout!

Congrats to the Champion

When I started this blog, I swore to myself and to a few of you that I would not blog about Reality TV. 

So...

I just wanted to give a shout out to my girl, Shawn Johnson, for winning the Olympic Gold Medal in Beijing!!!!

(Oh, and for winning Dancing With the Stars tonight... If you are into that sort of thing, which clearly, I am not! :) )

The Perfect Ten may no longer exist in gymnastics, but it sure does in ballroom dancing! 

Way to Go Shawn!

in the adult world

A few weeks ago I was dining with some friends at PF Changs for a friend's baby shower, when I had a shocking realization.  A group of high school students came into the restaurant looking all fancy schmancy and dressed up for the prom. One of my friends looked over at me and said, "Wow, doesn't that seem like forever ago." To which I thought, "Not really." And this is when it hit me that I actually felt more connected to the world where people were going to prom then the world where people are having babies (as you have been made keenly aware of in an earlier post!)

After our Bible Study last night I realized that there were some things, some social rules if you will, that I am going to have to relearn as I transition from the teen world to the real, adult world. In just a month from now I am going to have to learn how to eat, and dress, and talk, and text like someone who is 27 and not 17. Because in the adult world, I am pretty sure things don't work like they do in the teen world...

In the adult world, you can't actually eat pizza and toffee bars and ice cream pie for dinner. (A rule I should have learned a while back despite living in teen world...)

In the adult world, it is not acceptable to wear Nike shorts and a t-shirt any and every where you go. 

In the adult world, you aren't looked highly upon when you don't speak in complete sentences and the most common word you use in those fragments is "like."

In the adult world, you can't really get away with going to see every teen movie at least twice- secretly liking it, but publicly claiming that you only went for "work."

In the adult world, "work" won't include laying out by the pool, endless excursions to TCBY, and going to Six Flags. (I actually despise Six Flags, so won't really be sad to see this one go.)

In the adult world, people won't be interested in conversations where the topics include who is going to homecoming with who, and what stunts the cheerleaders did at the pep rally last Friday. 

In the adult world, you can't make announcements via text... ok, well maybe you can. But they probably can't start out with "Yo Yo Yo, whats up my peeps?" and then end with "Lylas". Can you imagine...."Yo, yo, yo, whats up my peeps? Meeting in the conference room at 10! Be there or be square! Lylas!"

Yes, I do send my Bible Study announcements like that or in poem form.

 So basically, I have a lot to learn and quite the transition ahead of me! 

On the upside, perhaps once in adult world, when I am standing with two 15 year olds and we run into someone's mom, that mom won't pat  me on the shoulder and say, "What's your name sweetie? I don't think I've met you before!"

Have a great day, my peeps! Lylas!

Oops, good thing I am not in adult world yet!

Dear Diary: Boy Crazy

Ok, I have always known that I was a little bit boy crazy. But this is just ridiculous! 

Karen, the good news is- we are friends again!  And I totally remember this night! Haha!

For those of you who don't know, Karen is one of my very, very best friends and has been for about 13 years. Just wanted to clarify since she has gotten a lot negative press thus far in the diary entries!

And for all the rest of you... here you go, for your reading pleasure! 

Dear Diary,  May 11, 1996 (a few months later)

Hey, I am so in love with Clay! He is the hottest guy I've ever met! I love him so much more than any guy I've ever liked before! He is so SWEET! I love him to death. My gosh, I'm crazy about him.

Last night Karen and I went to the Rangers game. It was awesome! First these guys hit on us! We found out later that they were SENIORS! Awesome, huh?!? Then these other guys came to sit by us. They were hics from Greenville! But they were freshmen. We were also hit on by a kid who looked like he was in the fourth grade! Oh well, the only bad thing is that we didn't see Clay! 

I decided that if Clay doesn't like me, I'd like him to like Karen. Who is better to like than my best friend? If she gets him, I'd be a little upset, but I wouldn't hate her. She deserves him. 

Well, gotta go! 

Luv in Christ-

Caroline

* Just in case you were dying to know...Clay and I never dated, and neither did he and Karen for that matter! 

Oh, and I am praying he NEVER reads this!!! 

In Christ, 

Caroline

Philippians 2:5

Celebration...

...let's all celebrate and have a good time! 

That was the song that played in the series finale of 90210, which I watched probably 20x's, and cried in probably 15. But whatever, that is another story not what this post is about!!! 

I had about a million reasons to celebrate this weekend (hyperbole? I think so). But I did have a lot of reasons to celebrate and here is just a few...

HOMECOMING...

Ok so this also NOT a post about my high school homecoming! C'mon guys, despite the fact that I write almost every other post about gymnastics, and still seem to wear my cheerleading skirt at every possible opportunity, I am not one to live in the glory days. And to be honest, not sure high school homecoming was all that glorious anyways. But that too is another story, and not what this post is about!

The real celebration was that my favorite (well only... but still favorite) sister came home from college this weekend for the WHOLE summer.

 Lindsay is one of my very best friends and just one of my favorite people to hang out with. And by a crazy turn of events, we both are looking at 2 whole months in the Big D this summer with virtually nothing to do. We are quickly filling up this time however with places to travel, plays to see, books to read, cooking lessons from mom, and a little working out and laying out too. I really couldn't be more excited and can't wait for it to get started! 

Welcome home Linds! I love you! 

HATS OFF...

Hats off  is definitely an order for one of my very best friends, Lucy... who graduated on Saturday from DTS with her degree in Biblical Counseling! Lucy has worked so hard, and always with great joy and diligence. What a great joy and privilege it was to be there with ALL her family and friends to celebrate this big accomplishment!

Tiny, I am so excited for you. Your love for the Lord and for his word is such an encouragement to me. You are full of wisdom. I am thankful for how you have shared this with me over the years, and look so forward to seeing how the Lord will use your wisdom and compassionate, counselors heart to impact people for his glory! Congrats, dear friend! I love you!!!

And HAPPY MOTHER' S DAY...

What a treat today was....getting to celebrate and spend the day with both my mom and my grandmother, Jackie who came in all the way from Shreveport. I don't remember the last time Jackie and Pops were here for this fun holiday, and so it was really special. Jackie, thanks for setting a great example and legacy for us to follow. Thanks for loving us all so well and for always listening to us! I love you very much!

And mom, every day should be one where we celebrate you. Your constancy and faithfulness, to our Lord, to our family, and to everything in your life are such an example and encouragement to me. You serve and love people so well, and so often when no one is watching. And I am humbled to have been a constant recipient of this selfless service and love for all these years! What a blessing it is to call you my mom and my friend! I love you more than you know. Happy mothers day!!!

No Plan B

Many thanks to many of you for your encouragement and prayers for my Bible Study last night! We had to cover a lot of things in just a little bit of time (but more time than usual because everyone was there on time and everyone stayed late...quite possibly for the first time EVER!) We had some great discussions and I think it went really well! 

One of the most surprising things of the night for myself was how emotional I became when we got to our last topic--singleness. I can't remember the last time I cried in front of this Bible Study. It had to have been at least 2 weeks. Ok, so I am a crier, and therefore, it wasn't really the tears that were unexpected, but maybe the reason for them...

The primary resource I gave out on singleness was an article written by Paige Benton Brown called Singled Out by God for Good. This article is jam-packed with humor and jam-packed with truth-- the truth of who God is and who we are in light of him. She talks about how while singleness, whether permanent or temporary, is most often not what we had planned for ourselves, it is not that way with God. In his goodness there is no Plan B. 

 Can God be any less good to me on the average Tuesday morning than he was on that monumental Friday afternoon when he hung on the cross in my place? The answer is a resounding NO. God will not be less good to me tomorrow either because God cannot  be less good to me. His goodness is not the effect of his disposition but the essence of his person- not an attitude but an attribute....

...I am single because God is so abundantly good to me, because this is his best for me. It is a cosmic impossibility that anything could be better for me right now than being single.

My tears came last night because as I was talking to "my girls" that I love so much, I realized how how beautifully and gloriously true these words were, how amazing this truth is. 

I remember my Plan A when I was their age: I was going to go to college and "date around" for the first two years. Then my junior year, I was going to meet some cute polo-wearing boy who loved Jesus and wanted to be a pastor. We were going to date for 2 years and get married upon graduating from college. Shockingly (or not so much), I had no plans for after the wedding. After that you just live "happily every after" right?

Well, this wasn't my story. My Plan A didn't really work out. 

My junior year of college I didn't meet some cute-polo-wearing boy. Instead that summer, I met dozens of soffee-short-and flip-flop-wearing middle school girls. It wasn't some boy with a winning smile that stole my heart, but a bunch of little girls with braces on their teeth. Upon graduating from college, I wasn't going to PCPC for my wedding, but rather for my job. 

My last 2 years of college, and my five plus years beyond haven't been defined by one significant relationship as I had always dreamed and hoped, but by dozens and dozens of equally significant ones! 

In what I possibly would have considered my Plan B, God has graciously allowed me be in the lives of scores of teenage girls... girls who I have loved more than I ever thought possible, girls who has impacted my life more than I ever dreamed. 

As I looked out over my girls last night, in what was our final official Bible Study, what brought tears to my eyes was the reality that God had been so abundantly good, so overwhelmingly gracious to me in not giving me what I had always planned.

Instead, he gave me something I never knew I wanted. Something I never knew I would need. He gave me people that  I never knew I could love so much. He gave me something that if I had known how good it would be, it would have been my plan all along.

I am so thankful that God doesn't always give us our Plan A, but his! I am so thankful today that the Lord is not always in the business of giving us what we want, but rather giving us what is best. I am thankful that his thoughts are not our thoughts, and that his ways are higher, better than our ways. 

I am thankful for the path that he has taken me on... the path I never knew I wanted, but the path I'd never change! 

To all my girls I have known and loved, I couldn't be more thankful for you and would never trade all these years for anything, not for any boy! 

Study on Sex, Dating, and Singleness

Ok, so yesterday I wrote a post asking for your help with my study on Sex, Dating, and Singleness for my Senior Girls Bible Study. This morning, I took it down, for the fear that my "tips" might seem moralistic without being connected to the greater context of our Bible Study- God's call for our lives- single, dating, and married- to love him with all that we are and to love our neighbors as ourselves. Living for his glory and the good of others! Anyways, per my sister's request, I repost it. (Love that this blog has become yet another area of  life for my fear of man to be exposed!)

Anyways, on Wednesday I finish up a College Prep Bible Study for my Senior Girls. Our last topic is Sex, Dating, and Singleness. Always a crowd favorite. Girls seem to come out of the woodwork for this. A few years back, I gave a 3 week series on Sex, Love, and Dating, and for those 3 weeks, and those 3 weeks alone, our study tripled in size! I love it. Primarily because I am the exact same way.

I am wanting to give my girls some resources to take home at the end of Bible Study. This week, I will give them several different things- one of which is my own thoughts, advice, things to remember on these areas of life. My longing for them is that they might have relationships that honor Christ, serve and love other well, and ones that protect their hearts, minds, and bodies. Would love your thoughts or advice- anything you think these girls should know upon going to college! 

                                 Tips on Dating, Sex, and Singleness...

                                                         ...From My Experience or Lack Thereof

 

1. Your relationship with the Lord should always be the most important relationship in your life.

2. Unless, a guy is your husband, his most significant relationship to you is as a brother in Christ. (I guess this is true even when he is your husband!)

3. Date a guy that makes you laugh, that you have fun with.

4. You might not marry the guy you date. He could be someone else’s husband. You could be someone else’s wife. Keep that in mind when you are considering boundaries physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

5. If your friends don’t like him, don’t date him.

6. Date/Marry a guy for exactly who he is and not who you hope he will be one day.

7. Date/Marry a guy who loves you for exactly who you are and not who he hopes you will be.

8. Be creative in the ways you spend time together.

9. If you are dating, include your single friends in your relationship.

10. If your roommates are gone for the weekend, don’t hang out at your house. And visa- versa. If his roommates are gone, don't hang out at his. 

11. Don’t have guy best friends. Your deepest, most intimate, heart-level friendships should always be with girls.

12. A guys character/heart are far more important than his good looks, athletic ability, what frat he is in, what major he has, etc.

13. Every guy you date, could potentially be one you marry. Therefore, be careful who you date in the first place. 

14. Hang out in groups so you can see how guys interact with other people. This is the biggest indicator of what they are really like.

15. Don’t act like you are married if you aren’t.

16. Even if you aren’t “sleeping together”, guys still shouldn’t spend the night at your house or in your bed.

17. The “one night” in one night stands only refers to the physical action itself. The memories and emotions and heartache last much, much longer.

18. The time that you are single is not just waiting time before the next relationship, it is given, ordained by God....live to the fullest in it, use it wisely, don’t waste it.

19. The best practice for a good dating/marriage relationship is seeking good relationships with everyone else in your life first.

20. Date someone who challenges you... spiritually, intellectually, emotionally. Someone who pushes you to grow and be a  better person.

21. Don’t make excuses for guys when they continually mess up/don’t treat you well.

22. Have accountability for your relationships.

23. Talk about your boundaries early in the relationship. They are much harder to decide/keep when you are in the moment.

24. Guard your heart in both your dating relationships and friendships with guys.

25. It’s true what they say in When Harry Met Sally, men and women can’t be friends!

26. Guys are visual- they are stimulated by and remember everything they see.

27. Ask your friends hard/personal questions about their relationships.

28. Seek counsel/advice from older Christians, both single and married, who you respect.

29. God’s grace and forgiveness does exceedingly cover and can redeem your sexual sin. One of my favorite aspects of Scripture is how God uses and Christ pursues the sexually broken. He can redeem guilt and cover shame and restore the person. 

30. The rules God gives us are to give us life, not keep us from it!

31. Every good relationship involves some kind of risk.

32. Being drunk is not an excuse.

33. Date someone who spurs you on toward Christ.