baby boom...

I'll settle the rumors that this title might evoke right now. No, I am not pregnant! 

Ok, so I am pretty positive that that thought didn't cross any of your minds, but I figured I'd cover my bases just in case!

Now to the real post: Upon graduating from college, something comes upon you that you are completely unfamiliar with- the wedding boom! All of a sudden friends start getting engaged left and right, and you start doing things that only months before would have seemed quite odd- you know, like spending $200 dollars on a dress that makes you look like a shiny gum ball or a rather large blade of grass, like buying your friends towels and pyrex for presents, or eating endless tiny pimento cheese sandwiches for lunch! 

But after a few years in the wedding boom, you begin to master the wedding etiquette. And after about 5 years, I believe I've done it, I have finally mastered it! (I, however, am not quite sure my wedding coordinator friends would agree since I am the ONLY one of our friends who they do not hire to help with their weddings. Don't worry, Mindy and Karen, I'm not bitter:)) 

But regardless of their professional opinions, in my humble opinion, I have mastered it. I send in my response cards on time. I buy my gift a few days early, so that it has time to be gift wrapped and I don't have to pretend like the Pottery Barn bag with tissue coming out is the "way it was supposed to look." I arrive on time, sit on the right side of the church, and never bring a guest if I am not "And Guest-ed" (Although this might be for other reasons:))

Ok, so I had all this perfected and mastered, but just when I was getting the hang of it, something new and totally unfamiliar hit me over the head like a baseball bat...THE BABY BOOM. Seriously, I am not sure what is in the water but it seems like ALL my friends are getting pregnant! That is how you get pregnant right, something in the water?? (Sorry, they didn't really cover those details at my private christian school!). 

This baby boom has brought with it a whole new set of things I have to learn:

1. How to wrap your gift. No one told me that you should wrap your shower gift in pink if it's a girl, blue if it's a boy, and some sort of gender-neutral pastel if your friends are going the old fashioned way and not finding out. So, this November I showed up at a shower for my friend Bess and her sweet little girl, with my gift all nicely wrapped in seasonal wrapping paper-dark greens, deep reds and oranges. I think it tried it hide it under my shirt when I walked in and saw that everything else was wrapped in a precious shade of pink. I was so mortified when I laid it on top of all that cute pink stuff, and just wanted to crawl under the couch when she asked who it was from. All I could do was awkwardly shrug my shoulders and say, "Happy Thanksgiving!"

2. Etiquette on suggesting a name! The main thing I have learned thus far, let people name their kid whatever they want. I keep offering up my name for people's children. I mean Caroline goes so well as either a first or middle name, and in my humble opinion is a great complement to any last name! If, however, they don't go with Caroline, I like to offer up Nastia as a good second choice! You've got to with a name that will ensure success, and what better than the legacy of an Olympic Gold-Medalist. This is when people usually cringe and say they are probably going to go with a family name. I mean, I guess that's cool too.

3. What in the heck to do when you go visit someone in the hospital. This is where my awkwardness just shines. I have no idea what to do, or what to say. Case and point- yesterday, I went with some friends to visit my dear friend Lily and her new baby girl, Abigail, in the hospital. Kim immediately grabs little Abigail, who I am too petrified to hold. Bess immediately asks her questions about how labor went, how she is feeding, etc. I have absolutely no idea what to do, so I choose to awkwardly sit in the chair in the corner, tightly gripping my purse, and trying to think of something good to say. Unfortunately,  only question that comes across my mind to ask is if that piece of chocolate cake from the hospital cafeteria is any good! 

Basically, I am back to square one. If anyone has any thoughts as to how I might wade my way through this baby boom, I am all ears. Many thanks to my friends who have given me the opportunity to master this new etiquette, thanks to you who have been patient with me as I learn,  and special thanks to the ones who have trusted me to hold their children! 

I guess for now, I will just keep practicing, so that one day I will master this too, and be ready for my very own little Nastia to enter the world!